People don’t like being called out, especially on lies. An effective approach to achieving the goals that calling people out publicly brings, is to also do it subtly, so only you and the liar know the truth. A subtle call out looks like normal conversation, in which you only hint that you are aware of the truth and therefore their lie. Calling people out on lies in extravagant ways leads to negative feelings in the lie-teller towards you. This opens you up to more lies, more deception, and more disrespect. Deal with liars respectfully and subtly, so there’s a greater chance they change, and stop their deceitful behavior towards you.
A subtle call-out will do two things:
- It will show mercy to the liar, and show them that there are no ill feelings towards them lying. This will make them feel like they got away with one, and that any more lies will be met with stricter punishment. They’ll have a feeling of gratitude toward you showing mercy and not embarrassing them, therefore increasing the chances that they will act nobly toward you from there on.
- It will not burn any bridges, and keep you in the loop of all things that the liar does for you, apart from lying. An emotional call-out on a lie will put a stop to any form of relationships that you worked hard to develop with the liar.
Move through life treating those that try to harm you with respect, and you will have a greater chance of putting a stop to their behavior while not forming any enemies. Some would tell you to not take it personally, but lies, deception, and general acts of evil are in fact very personal. This is the reason most victims can’t remain calm in addressing deceptive behavior shown toward them. Keep calm and show mercy, but always remember what that person is capable of.
The main goals of yours after you discover deception committed towards you are to put a stop to that behavior if you can, and not fall for any further deceptive actions by the other party. Both of these goals will be reached if you subtly let the deceptive party know about your awareness of the situation. The subtle call-out can be in the form of mentioning the facts in passing conversation, addressing the true facts rather than the lies, and fully ignoring their attempts at deceptive actions and efforts to lure you into an emotional state of war.
With this approach, you will keep track of your enemies and keep them close. The best way to handle those who deceive you is to keep tabs on them, and maintain good relationships with them. Don’t burn bridges, and do not get heated, you might feel like embarrassing the person in question but will thank yourself for not doing so once you cool off.
Do not act out in emotion-fueled revenge as a general rule, and especially with those who you catch in the act of trying to deceive you. Stay calmly alert and in the know while ensuring your actions are backed by strategy.