One of the more impactful mistakes you can make is to go about your life without noticing the effects you have on others.
Your state of assessing your own actions and behavior should be perpetual. Being in tune with the mark you make on the ones around you will educate you on how to improve going forward. Do not view being in tune with others’ concerns as something other than merely the desire for self improvement. You are not weak if you care what others think, and you’re not damaging your well-being in the process.
There are, of course, thoughts that others think which you should not care about. Things that purely come down to personal preference is one category on that list. If someone hates you for your taste of music, stop communication with that person right away. If they don’t like the clothes you wear, you shouldn’t like being around them. However, when your actions serve to cause others pain, you better be in tune with what you’re doing wrong.
This article will focus on the act of being distracting to those around you. Generally, distracting others tends to gravitate around being noisy in the same environment they’re in. However, there are a myriad of ways one can distract another. A distraction is anything you do which serves to take another person’s mind away from the task in front of them.
Separating Them From What They Care Most About
When your actions distract someone, you serve to separate their focus from where they want their focus to be. If a coworker is working on something they deem important to the success of their day, then your distraction will be met with hatred. Your distraction will shift their focus away from what they get paid to do. It will shift their focus away from doing the things that put food on the table and pays the bills, to whatever it is that you’ve done. For all you know, the act of distracting someone else is the act of robbing them of time they can be spending to save themselves and the world around them.
We grow to hate those who consistently distract us. People will try to avoid you if you distract them. They’ll also develop preconceived notions of your intentions, no matter how well intentioned you are. Should you communicate with them about productive and mutually-beneficial things in the future, they will assume you’re once again coming to distract. Should you propose something of value, they will assume that it should be ignored.
Consider it a big mistake to distract others. Their focus will be lost, and they’ll be careful with providing you that very focus down the line. Should a time come when the things you care about demand the focus of the ones you’ve distracted prior, they will not be willing to provide what you seek.
What You Do Is Not More Important Than What Others Do
Maintenance of your focus should not come at the expense of others’ concentration. If you depend on distracting things to help you achieve your own focus, such as music, ensure that they are not distracting anyone else. If you depend on speaking loudly when you’re on a call, make sure your colleagues aren’t being distracted by your tone.
Never assume that what you do deserves more focus than what others are doing around you. The ability to focus is a right which everyone who lives deserves to have. Should you work to take it away from them, the pain they feel will be equivalent to one of physical thirst and hunger. The will feel enslaved by your distractions, and will grow to deeply resent them. They will try whatever it takes to get away from you and the distractions you give birth to. You will become a person who others want to avoid and mute, rather than be around and listen to. Maybe that does not matter at the current time, but there will surely come a time when you need others to be around and listen.