Why You Need to Know If Attacks Are Personal

Human nature makes us accept any negativity from one another as personal attacks on our being. Whether someone cut you off in traffic, shoved you on the sidewalk, or wrote a nasty email about you at work, if you get upset at these occurrences then you took them personally. Freeing yourself from taking everything that happens to you personally will clear up your mind to focus on the things that you need to focus on in your day.

Evaluating Before Judging

The fact of the matter is that most, if not all the things you currently take as attacks against you are not adjusted to specifically hurt you. You have to have the peace of mind to analyze whether or not an action of another is catered to hurt you or if it is a generic attack that person would unleash on anyone in your place. If it is the latter, getting upset at the generic negative action of another is doing yourself more harm than good. The act of letting somebody’s general negativity affect your personal self means that you hold their actions in high regard, and that they baited you with their general negativity into a personal pain.

Analyze whether or not the actions of another would be replicated towards another person in your shoes. If you determine that to be the case, then do not let those actions affect you one bit. You should look at general negativity from somebody as a personal behavior trait of theirs, rather than a personal jab towards you.Look at their behavior as you would watch a nature documentary, in which animals, tribesmen, and nature itself all have personal traits that exhibit themselves without bias.

Analyzing Others Forces Us To Improve Ourselves

Viewing the actions of others in this light will make you a more positive person, and force you to evaluate your own behavior towards others. You will catch yourself exhibiting general negativity as if it is something ingrained in your genetic code and you will stop yourself. Know that the personal traits of others should not be automatic triggers for negative reactions of your own. This is the case for most of the negativity that is sent your way.

Your first reaction to negativity should not be emotion or the acceptance of a personal attack against you.The first reaction should be one of analysis, by analyzing the impersonal nature of the nasty behavior towards you. Know what triggered the person into committing such action towards you, and know that they would commit those actions despite who the receiver of their negativity happens to be.

On the flip side of this understanding, you will be able to better distinguish who is truly out for blood against you. The analysis of negative behavior towards you will show you the true villains in your life, who in fact do attack you in a personal manner. When you take all attacks against you in a personal manner, you will not be able to distinguish between personal and impersonal attacks efficiently. Personal attacks must be met with stern action in order to mitigate that behavior towards you. If you do not distinguish personal attacks soon enough, the damage caused can be irreversible.

Book Recommendation:

The No Complaining Rule: Positive Ways to Deal with Negativity at Work